A Milestone

I just hit 200 official followers of this rant infested arena of mine!

Congratulations, Rachel Jacobs! You're the lucky one that tipped me over to the big 2-0-0. I've absolutely nothing for you; however, next time you get stopped, just tell them you deserved it and that MC said so...maybe you'll get a warning.

To the other 199 of you, as always, I appreciate your time and validation of my occasional shenanigans, oft-wisecrackery, and otherwise complete disregard for the English language. I know there are more of you out there reading from the shadows. I don't appreciate you all any less than the official followers so don't start sending my whiny emails.

This Sunday marks a special day for MC, so be sure to check in for your appropriate comeuppance!

Ask MC (The International Session)

I may be presupposing here, but I got a simple question from MF (don't get any ideas...his first name is Max, ya dirty minded so-n-so). He sent me a link and asked innocently:

What? Did he do something wrong?

Nope. He's all clear, if you ask me. (And you did...) Pretty sure if you don't tailgate him, you're all good.

**Oh, and the link was to a UK site. Thus, The International Session. You know, because that's how I roll. Or, MF is from the UK. Either way...**

Ask MC

Today's question comes from Thomas. He wants to know the LEO thought process behind "not busting someone for doing something blatantly illegal".

Thomas provided the following example:

I recall times I've been sitting at a stoplight and I've seen a police car/motorcycle sitting at the same intersection with me waiting for a green light. Some less-than-observant-driver will do something like run the red or not stop when making a right turn on red or obviously speed through, yet the LEO does not make the stop.

A valid question, Thomas. I wish I had a simple answer for you. Unfortunately, there is quite the range from which to choose. It could be the officer is one his way to a call that supersedes a simple traffic violation. Keep in mind, not nearly every call we go to entails lights and sirens. Another possibility is the officer simply didn't see it. Contrary to popular belief, we are human and we miss shit sometimes. Could be he/she was using their MDC or there is a hot call on the radio and he/she is listening for updated locations. Maybe he/she was sharing witty repartee with a beat partner via computer.

Could be he/she is just lazy or just didn't feel like it...never can tell. Wish I could be more helpful, sometimes reality just isn't that exciting. I still appreciate the question, though!

Getting out from underneath

This'll be quick, I promise.

I'm taking a brief aside from LEO stuff to talk real quick about some personal stuff. Take what you'd like from it...

Last summer, the Wife and I decided we were tired of living paycheck to paycheck. I was working a ton of OT, but it never felt like we were getting ahead. The Wife had heard of a guy named Dave Ramsey. I was incredibly skeptical, but decided to read his book, "The Total Money Makeover". If you want to get rich quick, this ain't the book for you; however, if you want to get out of debt, bust your ass, have some money in the bank and have financial peace in your lives, I cannot recommend this book more.

You'll notice a new gadget on the sidebar of the blog proclaiming "I'm weirder than you!" One of DR's go-to quotes is, "Normal is broke...and I don't want to be normal." If you're interested, click the link. It will take you to his Total Money Makeover site. Your other option is to go daveramsey.com.

Following DR's financial guidance has changed our lives. The Wife and I are a team...always have been. Having financial peace in the MC house has made our marriage even stronger (and it was pretty damn good to start with!). We truly feel blessed to have discovered Dave and I just wanted to pass it along to you lot in the hopes that our experience can be a blessing to someone else as well.

We now return you to our usual programming...

911 and You

Picture this. You're out and about with the family and you witness a crime in progress or perhaps a heinous collision. You're in your hometown. You pick up your cell and dial 911. You assume it will go to your local jurisdiction, right?

Cue cheesy game show buzzer.

You are incorrect. But, thanks for playing.

Let's make the scenario a little more petrifying shall we? You're babysitting your friend's kid, grandchild, niece, and/or nephew. He/she got into the cleaning supplies and may have ingested something toxic. You pick up your cell phone and dial 911 expecting help to arrive forthwith.

Or, what if you interrupt a burglary and your husband is now wrestling with the felon? You dial 911 from the cell and anticipate the ear blasting, but comforting, sound of sirens. Hope you're patient...

More than likely, you're 911 call has been routed to CHP (at least in California...). So what, you say? So, this. More than likely, when you dial 911, you're going to be frantic. It's the 911 operator's job to calmly ask you some questions. Chief amongst them would be your location. Once they get that info out of you and they figure out you're not in their jurisdiction, they have to transfer the call to the appropriate agency. You'd think that'd be quick. It ain't as quick as you'd like, believe me.

Once the appropriate agency is on the line, they're going to have to get a lot of the same information you've already provided to the original agency. Then, the appropriate agency will dispatch the call to the officer(s) on the street. If you're lucky, you live across from a Starbucks where all the cops hang out. In reality, they're probably on the other side of town. Add response time from ten miles away.

We're talking about, from first 911 dial to a copper at your doorstep, anywhere from eight to fifteen minutes (depending on the priority of the call, staffing levels, location, etc).

MC, what the hell is your point?

Glad you asked. Don't be so bloody shy next time. My point is each of you should take the time to find out what the non-emergency police/fire/ems phone number is and program it into your cell phone. When you need us, the last thing you want to do is look around for a phone book or call 411. Why non-emergency? Because it goes to the same dispatch center and they're well trained to realize the screaming victim on the other end of the phone may actually have an emergency.

Consider yourselves educated. Carry on...

We've been ROBBED!!!

No. You haven't.

To some of you, this is gonna sound like MC is splitting hairs again. Well, tough. This is going to be one of those pet peeve themed posts. I suppose I could blame TV shows, Hollywood, the Media, Popular Culture and/or any combination of them. The point is when you pull into your driveway and discover your front door has been kicked in and your jewelry gone (seriously, ladies...stopping hiding it in the dresser! They know it's there!) you assume you have been robbed. In fact, you have not. Your home has been burglarized.

I'll get to the by-the-book definitions in a minute, but I want to add a disclaimer here. I realize you have been victimized. I know it's scary. The sense of having someone in your home uninvited and while you were away can be traumatizing. Nothing of what follows is meant in any way to minimize your perfectly legitimate feelings about the incident you've been forced into.

That being said...

PC 211 reads, "Robbery is the felonious taking of personal property in the possession of another, from his person or immediate presence, and against his will, accomplished by means of force or fear."

Only a person can be the victim of robbery. A structure (be it a home or business) can not be robbed. For the sake of illustration, consider this:

A strong arm robbery (force) could be illustrated by a suspect forcibly ripping a woman's purse from her person. Fear could come into play if someone points a gun at the same woman and says, "Give me your purse". Both are equally felonious. The key is that robbery requires a human victim.

PC 459 reads in part (trust me it's longer than I want to type out), "Every person who enters any house, room, apartment, shop, warehouse, store, mill, barn, stable, outhouse or other building, tent, or vessel with intent to commit grand or petit larceny or any felony is guilty of burglary."

Outhouse?!? Note to self...don't leave valuable shit in the outhouse. See what I did there? Outhouse. Shit. C'mon people...that's comedy friggin' gold!

Seriously though, you're more than welcome to check out the entire section for PC 459 here. Given what I've written above, it should be painfully obvious that humanity is not the key to this particular crime...structures are.

Now I realize that most of society's knee jerk reaction after being burglarized is to exclaim, "I've been robbed!" I know my silly little post isn't going to change the world. On the other hand, it nuts me up a little every time I hear someone claim they were robbed when, in fact, they were not.

More importantly, if you were to call your local PD and yell out, "I've been robbed!", you will almost certainly get a different kind of response. Calling in a robbery elicits imagery of guns and threats of violence. PD response for that is vastly different than in the one where you forgot to lock your front door when you left for work and now you're back 10 hours later and dammit if you can't find your 60" HDTV.

At the end of the day, I guess it boils down to being hammered for months at the Academy, additionally in FTO, and well, every damn day of my career, to know the Penal Code like the back of my hand. Consequently, I have my own knee jerk reactions. At least I'm aware of mine, right?

One Year Later

One year ago today, Sgt. Dunakin, Sgt. Romans, Sgt. Sakai, and Ofr. Hege of the Oakland Police department gave their lives. Two of them died doing what I do every day. They were making what started out as a simple traffic stop. The other two died trying to catch the man that killed their brothers-in-arms.

This is a tough day for those of us that live and work close to Oakland and closely with OPD. We can't imagine the grief and the struggle the families have gone through, but we continue to pledge our love and support to them.

Last year, I wrote a post to my kids after learning of the tragedy. It was more a stream of emotion than something I sat down to outline and format. The words you read then (and are welcome to read again or for the first time now) were my reaction to everything welling up inside. You can click here to read it.

Please continue to support your local law enforcement. Unless you're one of us, you can never truly know how far a simple kind word or gesture can go to reinvigorate us and remind us of why we're out here.

God bless OPD.

Scholarship Opportunity for your local SRO

School Resource Officers have a tough job. It's a job I am most assuredly not built for. I'm not a fan of the drama and political bullshit that comes with that gig. School administrators, parents, and teenagers? No f'n thank you!

Earlier this week, I was contacted by a reader, Kathy, with a request. Kathy asked that I pass along a scholarship program put on by NASRO (National Association of School Resource Officers. The annual scholarship is intended to help SROs further their education, thereby bringing more expertise and security strategy to protect the schools they serve.

If any of you are, or know, a deserving a SRO, check out the website. The deadline has been extended to May 1.

It's always nice to advance one's knowledge and education. And if you can do it using someone else's dime? All the more sweet!

Ask MC

Cali dropped me a line and asked me a question I'm actually surprised more folks haven't asked.

I have a quick question about fighting a ticket. In court, is the burden of proof on the officer to prove that Citizen X was in violation or is the burden of proof on Citizen X to prove that he was not in violation? Is the court format for traffic violations totally different?

Excellent question, Cali! Regardless of the venue, be it criminal or traffic, the burden always lies with the State. In criminal, the State is more often than not represented by a representative of the District Attorney's Office. In traffic, the State is represented by me and others of my ilk. The format is indeed different. Traffic judges will here a few dozen cases in the span of a couple hours. A single criminal case can drag on for ages.

If we don't prove to the judge beyond a reasonable doubt that the violation we alleged actually happened, the defendant needn't say a word. The trick is that most defendants are not adequately educated to realize that and will, on occasion, talk themselves into a guilty verdict by admitting the violation in their statement.

A little bit of homework in the vehicle code, a quick mind, and a basic understanding of law can sometimes get a defendant found not guilty. If, however, they show up unprepared, they will more often than not leave with their tail between their legs.

Self-Aggrandizement at its best..

A while back, I was contacted by Jeanette over at the Tactical Pants site. She wanted to ask me some questions about what it's like to pull someone over and the ensuing hilarity it sometimes results in. Even though she had previously interviewed my buddy, Happy Medic, thereby leaving me feeling like Second Hand Susanne, I rose above and was happy to answer whatever she wanted to throw out me.

Check out the interview here!

You can also follow Happy Medic and Jeanette on Twitter (@theHappyMedic and @jnetcat5, respectively...did I really have to add the respectively part?).

Are you sure?

Ladies and Gents, let me explain something to you. Today is not my first day on the job. I'm not a rookie. I also have wicked good eyesight. So, when I tell you that you didn't stop at the stop sign that is less than 40' away from me, rest assured that is the case.

A couple of weeks ago, I stopped an older gentleman for just that. He said, "Are you sure that happened?" I politely said, "Yes, sir. I am sure." Of course, I wrote him a ticket.

I don't know what it is I have to do to get you, the motoring public (my bread and butter, if you will) to understand something. I don't just arbitrarily stop folks on the off chance that they'll admit to something illegal.

Glance up real quick. That's right...a little further. See the blog title? Yeah. We've had this discussion before.

The point is this: I wouldn't waste my time stopping you if I wasn't sure. I'll wager I let half a dozen legit rags a day go because I doubt what I saw for a millisecond. Did that guy have his seatbelt on or not? Ahhh...I think so...fuck it, not good enough. (That thought actually hurtles through my Kazoo-like melon (Flintstones reference!) at a dizzying rate).

Here's another similar situation...

We get 911 hangups/abandoned calls every. single. fucking. day. 98% of the time, they're bullshit. Occasionally, they are not and deserve their own post. In this case, however, they are the aforementioned large mammal excrement. When I show up at your front door and ask you if everything is alright, I understand the confused gaze you shoot my way. However, when I tell you someone dialed 911 from your home, do me a favor. Don't look at me like I've got a third nipple on the tip of my bloody nose, okay? And certainly don't flat refuse to believe me and insist I've the wrong house. Because I don't.

I didn't pick your house out of a hat because I want to scope out your latest f'n kitchen remodel. I don't care how many awards your lame-excuse-for-a-dog shitzu has won. I knocked on your admittedly beautiful front door because someone or something in your house dialed 911.

It is typically one of six reasons:

1. You're an idiot and don't know the fucking difference between 911 and 411.

2. Your last name has more consonants than vowels and you were dialing your homeland using an international code that (wait for it) starts with a 9 and a 1.

3. Your last name has more vowels than consonants and see #2.

4. Your fax machine dialed it.

5. You run a sadly understaffed day care and your one of 25 kids just loves loves loves to use the phone.

6. You must dial 9 to get an outside line and you suck at dialing

So, when I rattle off your phone number, don't be surprised, okay? Again, I didn't just pop by for a quick hi-howya-doin'? Just be glad I got there as quickly as I did, thank me for my time/effort, and wish me a nice day. There are other jurisdictions much larger and much busier than mine that you could live in where you may have legitimate need of 911 and they may be so understaffed and/or overworked that you may very well be waiting a bit longer than you'd like in an emergency.

To sum up...yes...I am sure.

Hi. Remember me?

I've have always wanted to have the experience I am about to relate to you. I can now check this one off the list. Please to enjoy...

I was sitting at one of my typical spots doing my typical thing when I saw a handful of cars headed my way. They were all doing about the speed limit (35 mph); however, I noticed the second car in the #2 lane was following the car in front of it too closely. There was a car in the #1 lane that was just about parallel with the tailgater. The angle was no good for the lidar's DBC function (read: the violator was just too damn close). As the car in the #1 lane backed off a bit, the tailgater made a quick lane change to pass the lead vehicle in the #2 lane. He forgot to use his turn signal. Steeee-rike two! I stopped him and this is how it went.

MC: Afternoon. Do you know why I stopped you?

SELP (Self-Entitled Little Prat (UK represent!)): *haughty as all get out* No!

MC: Okay, well, initially, I was going to stop you for tailgating, but then unfortunately, you also changed lanes without signalling and cut off the driver in the #1 lane. I need your license, registration and insurance, please.

SELP: I live in I-have-more-money-than-God-burg (believe it or not...not the actual name of where he lives) and I followed that car all the way from there! They were driving really slow the whole way!

MC: Well, when I saw him, he was driving at 35 mph. As it happens, that is also the speed limit.

SELP: How fast was I going?

MC: The same speed, but just too close to him. But I didn't stop you for speeding, did I? I've explained why I stopped you. I still need your license, registration, and insurance.

SELP (hands over license): I think they rest is in the trunk.

MC: Okey doke (yup, I said it). Hop on out.

SELP (hands over stack of paperwork): My insurance is in there somewhere and I don't know where the registration is.

MC: Tell you what...(hands back paperwork)...I'm not gonna rifle through your papers. Why don't you go sit down and find something in that stack that shows this vehicle is currently covered and I'll be right back.

**I wrote the cite for both tailgating and failing to signal and returned to the car**

MC: Alright, I need your signature on the yellow highlighted portion please. Were you able to find your insurance?

SELP (hands insurance paperwork over): Why didn't you stop the car in front of me to see if they were insured?

MC: I'm sorry, sir. Are you implying that because they happened to be Hispanic gardeners they are not insured? Is that what I'm hearing right now?

SELP: **I'm not sure how to spell the noise pompous windbags make...but I think you can conjure that one up, right?** No! This is such a racket!

MC: I'm not sure I see how it's a racket, sir.

SELP: Fine. I'll see you in court.

MC: Fair enough. See you then, sir. Have a nice day

SELP: Yeah. You, too! (Again, haughty as fuck)

I walked back to the bike. This is where the story gets even better. Usually, I will immediately write my notes on the back of my copy of the cite. SELP made a U-turn and headed toward the intersection. It just so happens this particular direction restricts right turns on red. As in, you can't make one. I saw the right turn signal start to flash on his car. I think I giggled out loud. I know I said, "Make the turn. Make the turn. Make the turn. Make the turn." And he did.

Insert maniacal laughter.

I tossed the cite book in my saddlebag. I didn't bother to plug back into the bike or have time to put my gloves back on. The bike almost didn't start (whole other debacle), but I got her running and I was off. I caught up to him about 1/2 mile away and lit him up. Without missing a beat, I walked up to his window and, just like we've never met, I said...

MC: Afternoon. Do you know why I stopped you?

SELP: NO!

MC: Well, sir, you made a right turn on the red light back there. There's a clearly posted sign that indicates that is not allowed.

SELP: I stopped at the light!!!

MC: You certainly did. Unfortunately, though, you didn't wait for the green light to make the right turn and turned while the light was still red. I'm going to need your license, registration, and insurance.

**I thought his head was going to explode. Oddly enough, the more bent he got, the calmer I got...if for no other reason than I think it pissed him off that much more.**

SELP handed me the license and insurance. We have already established he didn't have the reg with him. I looked at the insurance and verified it with the VIN. I think steam was coming out of his ears by now.

MC: I'll be right back, sir. Please stay in the vehicle.

I walked back to the bike and scratched out a cite for failing to obey the sign. I could see him on the cell phone and knew what was coming.

MC: Okay, I need your signature on the yellow highlighted portion.

SELP: I want your name and number!

MC (myriad of inappropriate comebacks on the tip of my tongue): It's right on the citation, sir.

SELP: I'm calling the Town PD! You're getting a harassment charge in your file.

MC: Okay. I'll give you another warning about not having the current registration in your vehicle. Drive safely, now.

The funny part about him telling me he was calling the Town PD was that I work for the Town PD. Did he not see my patch? Or the top of the cite? Or the badge that clearly says "Town PD"?

I fired up the bike and headed to the PD. Just as I was pulling in I heard dispatch on the radio calling my sergeant.

Radio: Town Sgt.

Town Sgt.: Go ahead.

Radio: I've got a call for you regarding an officer complaint.

Town Sgt.: Copy.

MC: MC.

Radio: MC, go.

MC: I am coincidentally at the PD.

Dispatch got a chuckle out of that one. As is my habit, I taped both stops and played them for my supervisor. The end result? SELP never answered his phone (upon a minimum of three attempts to contact over a period of days). My supervisor's opinion? Maybe he shouldn't have committed so many violations back to back.

Truly priceless.

What really matters...

In the last six days, I've been to two funerals. Both men were killed during the same incident in the Fresno area. This post is not about what those brave men did. Instead, it is more about the reminder of what each of us has while we are here and the simple expression of the same.

As you can imagine, it was an exhausting experience. On the second day, we rode there and back. It was about 400 miles round trip. On the last 20 miles, it started to rain. Then, hail. I pulled onto my street cold, tired, wet, and spent (physically and emotionally). I looked up into the sky and saw what appears below. I walked in, grabbed my oldest and walked into the backyard to show her...

(Yes, that's actually my daughter and I!) The rainbow was complete...not one of those tacky partial jobs. Even cooler (although faint in the photo), there was a second rainbow above it.

I felt like God was patting me on the back and saying, "I had to take those men home. You are still there. Don't forget what you have and hold them dear."

Thank you, Lord.

Seatbelts

After having been to one funeral yesterday and getting ready for another on Monday, this ad got to me.




I know this blog talks about safety quite a bit. Short of posting graphic pictures (which I won't do, don't worry), I don't know of any better way to get the point across.

Thanks for sending this my way, Joe. You know who I pictured as my belt.

God Bless you TNT!!

I was fortunate enough to receive a sneak peek to Season 2 of "SouthLAnd" (which premiere tonight on TNT...check your local listings). Unfortunately, the drive that was sent to me didn't work. That won't stop me from supporting this fantastic police drama!

Not since "NYPD Blue" (thus far the best cop show EVER!) was on the air have I been so excited for a cop show (and Lord knows I'll watch any cop show at least once to see if it's worth my time!). It's nice to see a show that gives as much attention to character development and story line as it does to proper police procedure (insofar as a TV can, that is).

I'll never forget watching the Steve Martin classic "Roxanne" when the barn was on fire and he was giving direction to his rag tag band of volunteer firefighters. I remember my Dad being so impressed (he was still a captain back then). He said, "That was the same direction I'd have given if that was a real, working fire." Obviously, the folks behind "Roxanne" had competent consultants. The producers of "SouthLAnd" seem to have the same standard of quality that makes this show the "realistic, gritty, drama" it is portended to be.

Cops and firefighters are notoriously critical of how their livelihoods are portrayed; be it in the media or Hollywood. To get a resounding show of support from the LEO community is a feather in the cap of the cast, crew, producers, and, most importantly, writers of "SouthLAnd".

I stopped watching the continued bastardization of "Law & Order" years ago. Once Ice-T was cast as a police detective, I was out. Really?!? You boneheads are gonna cast the guy that sang "Cop Killer"? Your show can fuck right off.

So, you can bet my DVR will be fired up and ready come tonight! It's a well written, well acted show with quite a talented cast. I hope this show continues to perform well. If the first season was any indication, "SouthLAnd" is headed for the award show circuit come next year!

Well done, TNT! You've saved a quality show and have once again proven NBC has their collective head in a dark, smelly place. (With the exception of "Chuck", "Community", "The Office", and "30 Rock"...otherwise, suck it NBC!)

Ladies and Gents...I give you North State DA!

Since Cleanville seems to have some sort of delusional fantasy about arresting and apparently manufacturing a reason to assault an allegedly resistant officer, I asked North State DA to weigh in on Cleanville's desire to pursue legal action against an officer for an infraction. I highlighted what I felt was the most entertaining bit. Without further ado...

Alright, let's get some definitional issues out of the way, first: an arrest is taking a person into custody, in the manner prescribed by law (this part is important) (I'm not going to cite PC 834, because its too late at night for me to look it up . . . dammit, I just did. But its the last cite you will see in this post.) Our system, however, has changed the real definition of arrest- when MC pulls you over for yapping on your telephone, he is TECHNICALLY arresting you. Rather than putting you in bracelets and hauling you to the station, he issues a citation and lets you go. This is actually an arrest with a release based on a promise to appear (that's why you sign the ticket- without the John Hancock, he would actually need to take physical custody.)

Nobody thinks of a ticket as an arrest, but that's what it is. Remember the "manner prescribed by law"? Cops can't actually haul a compliant traffic offender in, because the law says that a cop must let the offender go on a promise to appear for minor traffic violations.

Now, about that citizen's arrest thing: here in California, citizens have almost the same powers as cops- its true! Here's an example: I have a concealed carry permit. Its not because I'm a Deputy DA, its because I applied for one as a citizen and was granted one by the sheriff. If I'm cruising along and see a man going after somebody with a knife, and its reasonably obvious that he intends to cut his victim, I can draw on the perp and, if he does not comply with my demands to drop the knife, I am committing no crime by blowing his head off. Just like a cop. 830.1, the statute that defines what it means to be a cop (OK, I cited another one, but its so common among LE personnel that its generic, like xerox and google,) allows peace officers to openly carry a loaded weapon, but does not allow them to use that weapon in any manner that is different than a private citizen. Cops can't shoot or brandish for no reason. A cop that whips his gun out and points it at a little old lady just to be a dick is guilty of 417 just as much as an average Joe (DAMMIT- I just can't help it!)

(Nothing said here should be taken to mean I have even a fraction of the training peace officers get in the carriage and employment of firearms. I carry one to deal with an immediate threat that finds me as a last resort, but cops have to GO TO the threat and deal with it. That's why we give them guns, pay them to practice with them, and let them carry those guns virtually anywhere.)

When it comes to arrests, citizens have the same rights as cops. BUT- cops have protections citizens don't. If a cop arrests you for an infraction, no matter how stupid and ridiculous, as long as a custodial arrest is not specifically prohibited, resisting that cop is a misdemeanor (which is a brand-new charge, to wit, PC 148 et seq- CRAP- OK, so my brain has been altered- bite me, or at least try- remember, I'm packin'.)

This means that if a cop arrests you, and you fight back or even simply refuse to cooperate, you are committing a new crime, and the cop is authorized to "persuade" you, perhaps with blunt force trauma or Edison's Medicine (Dear God, I love Tasers. A police report with a Taser deployment puts a smile on my face every. damn. time.,) if reasonable. Citizens DO NOT have that protection. A citizen can therefore be PROSECUTED for false imprisonment or assault or battery if said citizen attempts to arrest someone.

A citizen's arrest has been found to be legitimate when a man pointed at a dude and said "That's him." Here is a hypothetical: you are chillin' downtown, listenin' to your iPhone and mindin' your own. You see some shithead spraypaint a tag on the wall. Cop walks around the corner, sees the wet paint, and looks pissed off, so you point at the tagger and say "That's him." Congratulations, you just made an arrest. Its obvious what the crime is (vandalism) and you have identified the perp. That's all it takes in California.

So getting to the point (hey, quality takes time): Cleanville, if you see MC blow a stop sign, you can "arrest" MC by filing a sworn affidavit and submitting it to the DA's office (and they will get a hearty laugh and toss your affidavit in the nearest receptacle, but only after e-mailing it to the entire department and mocking you for being a pathetic dumbass.) But if you attempt to detain him with force, he will no doubt create a cheek-pavement interface, and will be legally entitled to do so.

As to the question of Misdo v. Infraction? I think MC is wrong- a citizen CAN arrest another citizen for an infraction. But since the code does not allow for a custodial arrest for most traffic crimes, the citizen would have to swear an affidavit or appear in person to a DA and ask the DA to take the case. Remember that police do not prosecute crimes- DAs do. Police are only entitled to remand into custody based on probable cause, but the arrestee must be arraigned within 72 hours of the arrest (if the defendant is in custody.). That means a Deputy DA must review the police reports and file a complaint within 3 days of the arrest, or the defendant cannot be incarcerated.

DA's delegate some of their authority to the police, and allow for direct filing of certain less-important violations with the courts. For example, your speeding ticket was never reviewed by a DA. The cop sent it to the court, and the court proceeds. The DA doesn't get involved (usually.) But a DA can always file a complaint, based on any information that meets legal and ethical standards. So if you are in your car, with a video camera, and you tape your TomTom saying that you are doing the limit at 55, and you tape some dude blowing past you, and the plate is evident on the tape, I can totally charge that case, even if you never called the cops. Would I? Fuck no- I have over 300 active cases right now, ranging from driving on a suspended license to manslaughter, with 5 new cases coming in every business day. I'm simply NOT going to give a shit about a dude in a Maserati doing 80. But you have the right to send the letter.

The ultimate point is (Dude! I have one!) is that you should totally sign a statement describing somebody's bad behavior and request criminal charges if you see somebody breaking the law, unless that perp is doing something that is going to immediately injure somebody else's physical person- then feel free to do the hero thing. However, unless somebody is going to die or potentially get seriously fucked up, wait until you can find a cop and ask for a CA (Citizen's arrest) form. Anything less would be uncivilized.

Thanks, DA, I appreciate your time! The overwhelming point seems to be that should Cleanville attempt to detain an officer for an infraction, he may find himself surprised to feel the bracelets on a different set of wrists than he originally intended. But again, good luck to you, Cleanville; however, I suggest you take up your complaints and self-imposed lunacy with your local District Attorney. I'm sure they've nothing better to deal with...